How do you get Grease and Grime from under your fingernails?

I Think now know where the "Goth" practice of wearing black fingernail polish originates. It was not a vehicle for self expression as most self proclaimed Goth practitioners believe. It is my theory at lease, that the practice was started by a couple of high school hot-rodder wanna-bees; backyard mechanics. These youngsters were faced with constant harassment, ridicule and discrimination at school and even at the 7-11; They were socially outcast. These grease monkeys could easily be identified, even from a distance, by the way they walked with their hands constantly hidden from view in front pants pockets. They hid their fingers less someone insist they go wash their hands. These young people would sit down for Sunday dinner with the family, fold their hands in front of them for the meal's grace, only to be shewed away from the table, being told to "it was a sacralidge to present those discausting hands to God in prayer."

Many would shun their love of all things mechanical and dirty only to fall into another often castigated group, "the preppies". But those who whould not deny themselves, these industrious young men and women, eventually found that black fingernail polish matched and masked the semi-permanent grease and grime stains under and their finger nails. Their colored digits still brought them attention but instead of ridicule from their peers, it was labeled a form of self expression and gained them "street cred". To their parents, it became "a typical teen form of rebellion" and dismissed.

This past weekend I spent working on the Volvo; Changing the plugs, wires, rotor and distributor cap, replacing the front break pads and discs, and replacing the strut mounts that had mysteriously broken after taking the car in to the dealer for some other minor work. My hands look like they belong to the monster from the tar pits.

I knew working on the breaks and struts was going to be a messy job so when at AutoZone to borrow a pair of strut spring compressors, I picked up a tub of mechanics hand cleaner. Other than completely drying my hands out, it did a decent job of cutting through the grime on the open areas of my hands and arms but did little to address the black rings that defined my cuticles and front edge of my fingernails.

I have scrubbed, soaked and scraped my fingernails and my hands could still pass for Bubba's down at the Quick Lube.

At 43, I am not interested in masking my problem with black acrylic. I have instead resolved to wear the grease and grime as a badge of accomplishment; proudly proclaiming Tim Grissom as someone capable of performing minor auto repairs... at least till such time as the black fades when I can revert back to anonymity as the mild mannered desk jockey that I am.

Perhaps I will buy a box of latex gloves before tackling the rear breaks next weekend....